Things not to do at 9pm

1. Bathe your dog after she rolls in something so foul on her final night-time potty outing, but she knows "something is up" and you almost have to carry her up the stairs and into the guest bathroom (because there is no hellish way she's going in my freshly cleaned master bath), and then she stands shaking in the bathtub because, really, a bath is just one step away from the true torture of getting one's nails clipped.