Seven Weeks

Dear Patrick: You are seven weeks old!

It's been a challenging few days for you and Mommy. As you grow and start to incorporate more of the world into your reality, you've become a bit of a grump. You've been irritable, a fitful napper, and overall difficult to please during the day. Bless the Lord that you still sleep decently at night. This is keeping Mommy from completely losing it.

We had a rough day yesterday, you and I. It seemed like nothing truly would sooth you, but the minute Daddy put you in the swing you would settle down. Didn't you want me to hold you? Didn't you like me, your Mommy, the one who feeds you? I felt insecure, that if I was a good Mommy I would know what you wanted. I cried more than once yesterday. Thank God Daddy was around to remind me of a few things. He said that you just had your own personality, that sometimes it was alright that you would rather take things in by yourself than in somebody's arms. It reminded me that I'm not always a very snuggly person either. I read an essay in "MotherShock" that commented on similar feelings, being "liked" by your baby. The author said that watching videos of those early weeks later on, she could see how her baby responded to her voice and presence in a way that was impossible for her to know in the moment. I hope that moment comes soon for me as well.

You do have lots of new skills. You can find your hands and bring them to your mouth, a favorite pastime. I'm not sure that you get that you make your hands move, although the thought might occur to you occasionally. You're legs never stop kicking, and nursing has become a rather physical activity. Let me say it again, nipples are not portable. When Mommy and Daddy pick the right moment, you settle yourself to sleep pretty nicely, especially at night. While I love cuddling you to sleep, I don't want to do it every night for the next 24 months. So I'll just be grateful that you'll go back to sleep (for the most part) at 3:29am. Since that is the time I'm writing this post, obviously you go back to sleep better than your Mommy. During the night, you'll sleep for four to six hours on average. This is pure and complete luck. I don't credit any of those books or theories for this accomplishment. It's just what you do, all I can do is encourage it.

We're getting the hang of this Mommy/Son thing. I'll just cut us some slack, we've never done these jobs before.

Love
Mommy